Wednesday, July 8, 2020

Beware of our mental reservations

MENTAL reservations are hidden, unexpressed thoughts that
accompany our reactions to things, our statements and affirmations.
They are simply kept in our mind for some reason. If the reason is
good, like these thoughts are kept hidden out of charity and prudence,
then they are good. But if they simply are negative and critical, then
they are bad and can be dangerous to us.

            Certainly, we cannot avoid these mental reservations since
we cannot express in words and deeds everything that we have in our
mind and heart. It could be because of our own personal limitations,
or because of some doubts that we are still trying to sort out, or
because external factors and circumstances induce us to keep them to
ourselves.

            We should just be wary of those mental reservations that
are negative and critical and intentionally kept hidden and
unexpressed, because they can be poisonous to us. They prevent us from
doing what we are supposed to do in those instances when we are
visited by negative and critical thoughts.

            These bad mental reservations tend to detach us from those
who provoke them in us. Or we would just treat these mental
reservation provocateurs with tolerance, indifference and coldness. We
would find ourselves quiet when we happen to be with them and secretly
finding ways to get away from them.

            This, of course, is the not right way to deal with others.
We are supposed to love everyone, including those who for one reason
or another we do not like or who cause us some inconvenience.

            What we should rather do, if we are to be consistent to
our dignity as a human person and as a child of God, is to convert
those bad mental reservations into reasons and occasions to love more
those who provoke them

            These bad mental reservations are actually offering us
golden opportunities to grow in the virtue of charity, which is what
is proper to all of us. They invite us to expand our understanding of
the virtue of charity. They prod us to raise our love for others to
the next level.

            They can require heroic efforts. But to be sure we can do
it, because in the first place the grace of God of is always
available, and that grace is actually given to us in abundance. We
should just make the necessary adjustments in ourselves in terms of
attitude and skills of how to deal with those with whom we may have
serious differences and conflicts.

            We just have to be more open-minded and big-hearted,
always keeping a sporting spirit and a good sense of humor, and be
flexible and resilient. We should not take ourselves too seriously,
thinking that we are always right or that our views are always the
right ones.

            Many times what is needed is simply to forget our own
selves and focus our attention and interest on the others, always
trying to figure out what we can do for them. We should learn how to
accept everyone as he is without forgetting the duty to help him to be
what he ought to be. This can only happen if we truly know what man is
as shown to us by Christ.
  
            We should learn the art of always looking at the positive
side of all persons, never allowing ourselves to be trapped in the
negative things we see in them—their defects, mistakes and failures,
their offenses.

            When the negative thoughts and reactions come to our mind,
let’s be quick to eliminate them, or better still, to convert them
into impulses of finding ways of how we can help them. We should feel
challenged when we find ourselves in that situation.

            The very least thing we can do is to pray for everyone. In
the end what matters is that we do not find ourselves bearing some
negative thoughts. They are toxic and dangerous. They prevent us from
growing in charity!

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