Conversion is a lifetime need

WITH the season of Lent, we once again are reminded of the
need for conversion. Let’s hope that we go through this process in a
most sincere and thorough way so much so that we would emerge from
this season as a new creation once again, as God wants us to be.

            We can never over-emphasize this need for our conversion
and renewal. In spite of our best intentions and efforts, we somehow
would find ourselves in some irregular, imperfect if not completely
sinful situation.

            If Adam and Eve, our first parents, still in their state
of original justice, managed to fall into sin, how much more us who
have been born already handicapped and wounded with original sin and
exposed to all sorts of temptations and sin in our earthly life.

            The Book of Proverbs tells us that “the just man falls
seven times, and rises again.” (24,16) And our spiritual warfares are
no trivialities, since “we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but
against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the
darkness, against spiritual wickedness in high places.” (Eph 6,12)

            That we are all sinners and in need of conversion should
come as no surprise to us. We just have to be realistic in handling
this lifetime predicament of ours, making use of all the means that,
thanks to God, have also been made available in abundance.

            There’s confession, for one, and the Holy Eucharist,
spiritual direction, regular examinations of conscience, indulgences,
etc.

            There’s just one interesting thing that, I believe, is
worth bringing up at this point in time. And that is that conversion
should not just be a matter of a moment, but should rather be a stable
state of mind and heart.

            St. John Paul II’s encyclical, “Dives in misericordia”
(Rich in mercy), has some relevant words about this point. “Authentic
knowledge of the God of mercy, the God of tender love,” the saintly
Pope said, “is a constant and inexhaustible source of conversion, not
only as a momentary interior act but also as a permanent attitude, as
a state of mind.”

            He continues: “Those who come to know God in this way, who
‘see’ Him in this way, can live only in a state of being continually
converted to Him. They live, therefore in ‘status conversionis;’ and
it is this state of conversion which marks out the most profound
element of the pilgrimage of every man and woman on earth in ‘status
viatoris.’” (13)

            It would be good to go slowly on these words if only to
feel at home with this wonderful truth of divine mercy as well as our
lifetime need for it. Let’s hope and pray that we can manage to
conform our attitudes and core beliefs along these lines expressed by
St. John Paul.

            These words are no invitation for us to be lax in
conscience, since anyway divine mercy is readily available. On the
contrary, they invite us to be as sensitive and delicate as possible
in our conscience, but without falling into the extreme of
scrupulosity and unhealthy obsessions.

            Let’s remember that every virtue is between two extremes,
not in manner of a middle ground or a compromise, but as the maximum
between the vices of excess and defect. Our attitude toward continuing
conversion should not be a consequence of either a lax conscience or a
scrupulous one.

            The relation between God and us should always be marked by
joy, peace, mutual trust, even if many times we fall into sin. It is a
relation of an all-good father and a bumbling child where intimacy,
transparency, compassion, understanding would reign supreme. There is
correction and some penalty, of course, but all given in the context
of love and compassion.

            Considering the way we are, afflicted as we are with all
sorts of vulnerabilities but may still profess great belief and love
for God and others, we need to go through frequent conversions even
every day.

            Opus Dei founder, St. Josemaria Escriva, once said: “Each
day is not just one conversion. It is many conversions. Each time that
you rectify and, seeing something that is not going right (even though
it may not be a sin), you try to divinize your life more, you have
made a conversion.”

            The possibility of daily frequent conversions is high
because of the fickleness of resolutions, and the objective reality
that in spite of our best intentions and efforts, we still come out
with ideas, words, deeds that are spiced with all sorts of
imperfections.

            We should be humble enough to acknowledge these, even if
we also acknowledge the good things we have done.