In matters of opinion

WE have to play it cool when we discuss matters of

opinion. These, in the first place, are views that are hardly based on

absolute truths of faith and dogmas. They are more expressions of

one’s preferences and tastes, and therefore we should expect a wide

spectrum of differences, since things depend on people’s different

temperaments, backgrounds, cultures, etc.

            Yes, we can have some exchanges and try to sort out these

different and even conflicting opinions if only to clarify things and

perhaps to eke out a most fair view with respect to a particular

issue. We can attempt to have a kind of consensus.

            But all these should be done in an atmosphere of mutual

respect and utmost charity and delicacy. We have to avoid bitter zeal,

sarcasm, irony, insults, ad hominems, mockery, vulgarity, nitpicking,

fault-finding, one-upmanship, the crab mentality and the like.

            In our discussions, let’s see to it that we try our best

to see and understand why the others have views that are different and

even conflicting to ours. We have to know where they are coming from.

            Let’s be conscious of the most subtle trick to impose our

opinions on others by asking questions or clarifying based only on our

biases and preferences. I must say that in this regard, many people

fail to realize. This usually happens in the area of political issues.

            And that’s why, very often the discussion turns into

wrangling, bashing and slamming. It becomes ugly and unproductive. We

have to learn the art of agreeing to disagree, and manage to leave the

hot discussion as friends and gentlemen. In this way, we can maintain

a certain unity among ourselves despite the wide diversity.

            Even in matters of faith and dogma where our core and most

sacred beliefs are involved, we should not impose ourselves on others.

We can proclaim our beliefs and we can do it as forcefully as

possible, but still always in the context of charity.

            We have to follow what St. Paul once said—that we have to

speak the truth in charity so that “we will in all things grow up into

Christ himself, who is the head of the body, the Church.” (Eph 4,15)

In the end, to be like Christ, “alter Christus,” if not “ipse

Christus,” is our ultimate goal.

            And if we look closely at the example of Christ, he was

always open to anything even as he proclaimed the truth which is not

anymore a matter of opinion. He showed utmost fidelity to his mission

without twisting people’s arms, much less, spewing threats.

            In the end, he accepted death which can only mean that he

bore all the sins, mistakes, faults, and all the other negatives of

men. He offered not only understanding but also forgiveness.

            We have to learn how to be sport and cool in our exchanges

of opinions. We need to rein in our emotions and have a clear vision

of the ideal that we have to live in these discussions. Charity should

always prevail, because the truth, justice and all the other values we

are interested in would lose their essence if charity is absent.

            And charity here can only come from the charity of God as

revealed to us and lived fully by Christ.