Sunday, October 7, 2012

Revisiting marriage


    “WHAT God has joined together, let no man put asunder.” (Mk 10,10) We
have just been reminded of the bibilical basis for the indissolubility
of marriage recently.

    With all the forces and elements now undermining the true nature and
purpose of marriage, there is an urgent need to clarify and show the
real face and beauty of this human, natural as well as supernatural
institution.

    Countries and nations, supposedly developed and quite rich, are now
legalizing forms of marriage that really have nothing to do with
marriage. Same-sex unions, divorce, civil marriages among Catholic,
temporary unions and cohabitations are not only spreading but are also
getting legalized.

    The consolation so far is that they have not gone as far as to outlaw
marriage as traditionally understood and as a sacrament. But if we are
not careful, who knows what can happen in the near future?

    If they can legalize abortion, not to mention, contraception, there
is reason to suspect these distortions of marriage can also be
legalized sooner or later. So, we really have to keep close watch on
the RH Bill, because the bad spirit behind it is the same one that
animates all these disturbing developments involving marriage.

    In fact, someone just told me the Philippines is under heavy pressure
now because we seem to be the only country in the world that has not
legalized divorce yet. And there’s a bill already filed in Congress
seeking to legalize divorce.

    There are those who are quite convinced, and wrongly convinced, if I
may say, that marital problems can be solved by legalizing divorce. We
need to talk a lot about this issue.

    The statistics on the ground seem to favor divorce. Of 10 Catholic
couples, a friend told me, 4 are married in Church, 3 are civilly
married and 3 are simply cohabiting. That’s, of course, a big problem.
But it’s actually a challenge to face that requires more concerted and
comprehensive efforts from those concerned.

    We are contending with a world culture that has lost the capacity to
think deeply and thoroughly. It’s an ethos that is held captive by the
quick and easy way of thinking and reacting, dominated mainly by
worldly values like convenience, practicality, popularity, etc.

    The full and global picture of who and what we are is ignored if not
ridiculed. This, of course, determines our proper attitude and praxis
about marriage and the other institutions related to it—family,
education...

    The spiritual and supernatural dimension of man is set aside. Instead
only the material and social aspects are considered. The dynamism of
today’s world, now heavily dependent on new technologies, has made
people to be less thinking and just to be more practical, if not more
self-absorbed and self-seeking.

    The objective, fundamental laws of our life, as written in our nature
and as given by God our Creator, are often glossed over. In their
stead are our mere estimations of things that simply come from purely
human criteria arrived at through certain consensus.

    In the effort to correct this anomaly, we need to learn how to
explain, with gift of tongues, the biblical basis of marriage,
connecting it with what our own reason can actually and easily
discover.

    Our problem now is that many people consider the Bible as remote, if
not completely irrelevant and just a trouble-maker. We have to correct
that by making an effort to meditate more deeply on God’s word,
knowing that it is a living word that will never become obsolete, but
rather will always be relevant to us in our varied situations.

    As Pope Benedict’s Verbum Domini puts it, we have to ask: What does
the Bible say about a particular issue, what is it saying to me now,
what is it trying to say to all of us now?

    From there, we can use all the human sciences and knowledge to
explain why marriage is between one man and one woman, why it is
indissoluble until death, why spouses have to live chastity just like
anybody else but according to one’s state in life?

    We have to explain why healthy marriages lead to healthy families
that in turn lead to healthy societies and a healthy world.

    I’m happy to know that certain groups are into busy advocacy for
healthy marriages. I can cite the Beyond-I-do group as one of them.
May more groups of this type come out.

    There’s a great need for them, even if the demand may still not be
felt. But with the challenges of the times, I’m sure many people will
realize the value of these groups.

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