Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Developing a healthy self-esteem

ONE sad thing that can be observed around is to see
people, even young people, who have a very low self-esteem. They are
usually shy and withdrawn, and if you get to know them better, you
will most likely discover that they suffer a range of anomalies and
irregularities like self-pity, doubts and fears, depression, etc.

            There are, of course, others who may appear assertive and
aggressive, but again if you get to know them better, you will also
discover that all that assertiveness is actually a form of defense
mechanism to cover their low self-esteem.

            It’s a challenge indeed to let these people realize that
they have no reason at all to have a low regard of their own selves.
But this will require some tedious explanation that has to be given in
a period of time and in some appropriate if not catchy ways.

            The usual factors that go into this phenomenon are the
usual human problems that people can have and which they do not know
how to cope. These can be some low economic or social status, personal
problems involving the temperament and the emotions, family and
professional problems, mistakes and failures committed, expectations
not met, lingering sense of frustrations and disappointments, etc.

            It’s a pity because some people allow themselves to be
trapped in a self-inflicted restricted view of life when in fact all
of us have every reason to be confident and happy, irrespective of
whether things in their life are going well or not.

            And that’s simply because regardless of our status,
situations and conditions in life, we are all children of God who
loves us no matter what and who is bent to bring us back to him from
whom we come, if only we allow him.

            That is why it’s important that we always bring in the
fundamental inputs of our faith to tackle this problem, and to let
them shape our outlook and attitudes. If these truths of our faith do
not or hardly play a prominent role in developing our life, then we
have reason to think that we are prone to fall into low-esteem.

            Imagine the following truths of faith: We have been
created in the image and likeness of God. We have become the
masterpiece of all his creation. We are the only ones, together with
the angels, who can know and love God and thus enter into his life.

            We are children of God because even if we have committed
sin and strayed from him, he continues to love us and would do the
most complicated process of saving us by becoming man himself,
enlightening us about who we really are, and assuming all our sins by
dying on the cross.

            One psalm expresses the extreme amazement at this divine
love for man: “What is mankind that you are mindful of them, human
beings that you care for them?” (8,4)

            If we can only believe that God truly loves us no matter
what, we have no reason to have low esteem. On the contrary, we can
show confidence and joy, even a healthy kind of superiority complex,
despite our worst conditions in our earthly life.

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