Dealing with unavoidable tensions

WE cannot avoid tensions in our life. They are actually a
necessary ingredient for our development. Not only do we have to
contend with differences and conflicts between good and evil, right
and wrong. We also have to grapple with legitimate values that seem to
compete with each other. We just have to learn to deal with this
tricky but healthy kind of tension.

            In the Synod of Bishops now going on in the Vatican, there
is such tension taking place. Aimed at how to face the modern and
complicated challenges to marriage and family, the Synod members are
trying to figure out how to blend the requirements of doctrine and
pastoral care, law and the spirit, justice and mercy, truth and
charity.

            In theory, these pairs ought to be together in some mutual
healthy relationship. Their basis and source of power and
effectiveness is God himself who is everything to us. But in real
life, given our human condition that is wounded by sin, that unity is
very tenuous, if not elusive, giving rise to tensions.

            Before this predicament, we should be cool and not
over-react by getting unnecessarily nervous, leading us to make wild,
uncalled-for reactions. Let’s always remember that everything is under
God’s control in spite of our shortcomings and mistakes. His
providence never fails. It can always manage to produce some good even
from the rotten core of evil.

            We have to learn to face the reality of things as they
are, warts and all, knowing also that if they are the way they are
now, it’s because God allows them to be. And if God allows them to be,
it’s because there is some good that can be derived from them.

            Pope Francis hits it bull’s eye when he encouraged the
Synod bishops who come from all over the world to speak their mind
freely, with parrhesia, he said, that is, with candidness, but also
with humility, always respectful of the views of the others.

            This is to have to a good picture of the world situation
with respect to marriage and family. Obviously, some biases and
prejudices will color the discussion. But if there is parrhesia and
humility, as the Pope recommended, we can presume that things can also
be properly and soberly sorted out and put in their right places.

            We cannot ignore the gravity of some cases, like those of
couples who have divorced and remarried but who want to receive
communion, those separated due to economic and other reasons, the
increase of illegitimate children, etc.

            We need to have some practical means to help these
faithful in these difficult situations. How to extend mercy and
understanding to them, what steps to take to recover them into full
communion, etc., are issues to be looked into more closely.

            There obviously are things that should not change since
they are essential to Christian and human life, but there also are
many things that need to be revised, modified, updated, refined, etc.

            A lot of wisdom, prudence, discretion, courage and
optimism are needed here. Certain bold measures have to be taken given
the gravity of the situation. Yes, we have to be realistic, but always
on the right track, even if we have to open new frontiers.

            This is not going to be an easy task. Nothing less is
required than for everyone to be truly united with God and to be
keenly discerning to the promptings of the Holy Spirit who is the one
to guide us in all this maze.

            That’s why that Gospel message to “ask and you will
receive, seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened to
you,” is most relevant these days. We have to be persistent, undaunted
by the difficulties we are going to meet.

            We need to realize that to tackle these issues, what is
indispensable is true, breathing sanctity of everyone, especially the
bishops and priests. Pieces of advice, suggestions, clarifications,
brilliant ideas based on some insights and human considerations can
only go so far, and are effective only if based on one’s sanctity.

            We have to be wary of our tendency to rely only on some
structures and bureaucratic mechanisms. They certainly have their role
to play. But if not vivified by one’s sanctity, they will not be
effective and can even cause harm to people.

            The ways of God, the promptings of the Holy Spirit can be
discerned and can prosper only on the firm ground of one’s sanctity.
We have to pray for the sanctity of everyone.