Marriage besieged

IT’S good that lately we are seeing some stars and celebrities, both local and foreign, getting pregnant and giving birth.

I suppose human nature cannot be tricked for long. I often wondered how these gifted, beautiful women, with all their widely publicized romances, managed not to have children. Are they the experts of the so-called ‘safe sex’?

Of course, common sense tells me not to waste time on the topic. Going there would at best be indulging in gossip. But the thought sometimes flashes in my mind, as if blinking some dangerous signals.

Now that they have babies, and beautiful ones at that, worthy of being photo-oped and gossiped again in the press, there seems to be a mad rush for getting pregnant. Motherhood suddenly has become a vogue.

But while this development is most welcome—babies are always a blessing—a terrible spoiler escorts it. And that is that some of these women are not married. They even look down on marriage and vow not to get married while having a baby.

With this info, we have reason to suspect that having babies is, for these publicity-obsessed stars and celebrities, just a gimmick, a stunt in their clever playbook for gaining points in the public mind.

Of course, we have to be most careful in tackling this phenomenon. There are other complicating circumstances that have to be considered. And we should be ready to be understanding and merciful when we discover some mistakes. We should not get stuck with simply lamenting and condemning.

But….

I think we also have to tackle a problematic fallout or side-effect this development presents us. And that is that the example they give, especially to our young ones with all their wild exploding hormones, can be disastrous.

The few times I got to know about teen-aged pregnancies almost always indicate the big influence these erring stars and celebrities had on them. And since their situations were not as materially favorable as those of the stars, the consequences of their mistakes had been far more painful.

In fact, these irregular situations often inflict unspeakable pain and injury to the parties involved and their families.

We have to make a clear stand here. Especially these days when the environment has become increasingly complex and confusing, I think all of us, again especially the young, need clear and solid, not vacillating, guidance.

While we cannot avoid, and in fact, it is also necessary that we learn how to flow with the times, bending and adapting with them, we should never forget, much less, go against the basic truths of ethics and morality. That would be the sure way to get lost.

In this particular issue, we should reaffirm, re-echo and resonate the natural, organic link among human love, sexuality and marriage. We have to show the full picture of these three elements so their pristine wisdom and beauty surface.

We should make everyone appreciate better the natural properties of marriage, that is, its unity (between one man and one woman) and its indissolubility. We have to explain these things thoroughly, systematically, effectively.

Especially now when we are hearing of same-sex unions now legalized in parts of US and in other countries, we have to patiently and charitably explain why it is wrong, why it is against our own nature even if the parties involved consent to it.

Let us also explain well why the conjugal act, always in the context of love and marriage, is by nature both unitive and procreative, not just unitive without being procreative, or just procreative without being unitive.

Most important, we have to show how fidelity to these moral principles can only take place when one has a living relationship with God. If we just rely on our own cleverness, etc., we put a limit to things, and sooner or later, we start to distort the process.

Many other things can be done. Of course, our Church leaders should take the lead in this constant effort, but all other parties in society should their part. The media especially has a crucial role to play in this concern.

We have to find relief to the institution of marriage that seems to be under savage attacks these days in many fronts.